Living with ADHD can impact many areas of your life—finances, work, relationships, emotional well-being—and yes, sex.
Let’s get down to why this happens, along with tools that can help you.
How Can ADHD Affect Sexual Desire and Pleasure?
ADHD tendencies show up both in and out of the bedroom, which can make sexual intimacy a challenge.
Hyperactivity
Hyperactivity can stop you from being fully present while having sex as it may be difficult to relax enough to enjoy the experience. When your mind and body aren’t connected, it can be difficult to enjoy sex. This struggle can lead to sexual dysfunction and dissatisfaction for both you and your partner.
Reduced Sensitivity and Hypersensitivity
Due to its impacts on the brain and nervous system, ADHD may reduce your sensitivity or make everything feel like the sensation is overwhelming. If you are extra sensitive to a sensation that is somehow repulsive no matter if it’s touch, tastes, sounds or smells during sex, the experience can feel off-putting or even repulsive. Can take over and complete distract
Hyposexuality and Hypersexuality
Sexual desire exists on a spectrum, but people with ADHD can experience extremes.
Hyposexuality is a term used to describe having very low sexual desire, which can arise from ADHD or the medications that treat it.
In contrast, Hypersexuality is when a person has an extremely high sex-drive, sometimes to an unhealthy degree. If you struggle with this, you may feel like you can never be satisfied, and impulsivity may lead to risky sex.
Low Self-Esteem Impacts Intimacy
It’s important to mention that how we feel about ourselves impacts our sexual relationship/s. The difficulties you have experienced navigating the world with ADHD might be impacting your sexual intimacy.
For someone with ADHD, many things in life take more effort and may mean a person has developed a problem with their self-esteem, self-worth, or problems with their identity. Developing sexual intimacy with a partner may feel harder for you, especially if your ADHD symptoms lead to sexual dysfunction.
What Can Help?
Having a healthy sex life is important to our overall well-being and contentment in our lives and relationships. A healthy sex life can actually even contribute to our physical health!
ADHD can impact sexual intimacy, but there are techniques to help achieve a satisfying sex life.
Have Open and Honest Conversation
If you or your partner have ADHD, keeping an open line of communication for intimacy is important.
For example, if the romantic music your partner plays distracts you during sex, it’s important to share this with your partner.
Meditate
Mindfulness activities, like meditation or breathwork, can help your focus, lower impulsiveness and relax your mind and body.
Make Sex a Regular Thing
If you have a regular sexual partner/s, having sex regularly may help you to become more comfortable with it. If ADHD causes you to get bored more easily, regular sex opens the door for trying new things. In either case, practice makes progress!
Start Sex Therapy
Tackling sexual problems might feel embarrassing, but Certified sex therapists are trained to help men, women and couples work through relationship and intimacy issues.
Having pleasurable, passionate, and satisfying sexual intimacy is not only possible if you have ADHD, but you can bring joy and pleasure to your partner/s by being uniquely you.
Is ADHD affecting your sexual intimacy? Don’t suffer in silence. CHMHST can help.
