Good sex begins with self-acceptance
Body image is one of the leading psychological issues that can trigger sexual troubles and dysfunctions. We cannot function sexually if we hate our bodies and ourselves.
To be sexual we must feel comfortable showing our own nude body both aroused, and relaxed. During sex, the initial sight of seeing each other nude turns up the heat and enhances the sexual experience. If we feel uncomfortable looking at our own nude body, how can we feel comfortable and relaxed while nude in front of other people? So, when the time comes to be nude with another person, that discomfort translates into tension and anxiety that limits our sexual response.
The media impacts your sex life
A low body image is one of the many impacts of self-hatred. At an early age, we are socialized to believe that what is shown in the media is what the ideal body should look like. As we get older, these images dictate our own views of beauty. If we are not socialized to accept our bodies, we begin to compare ourselves to the media’s view of ideal beauty. When you combine that with low self-esteem, critical parents, and the impact of peers, a person can really develop a self-hatred of their own bodies. This self-hatred leads to a variety of difficulties, both sexual and psychological.
When we reach the age where we start noticing the opposite sex, we must expose those very parts we learned to hate and show it to a person you have a crush on. As a result, we say such self-demeaning things about ourselves like: “I am so fat”, “I am ugly”, or “why would he/she be into me, I am so unattractive.” As a result, a person is focused on the negative feelings about themselves rather than on their partner. This is true for those people having sex for the first time or the 150th time.
When we bring that self-hatred into the bedroom, it causes us to shut down and tense up. This is because of the anxiety created out of exposing the parts of one-self that they deem unattractive. Anxiety has the ability to feed on itself, growing stronger and stronger until it becomes overwhelming.
For example, a women experiencing painful intercourse repeatedly will eventually fear the pain and avoid sex all together. That is how anxiety can lead to all sorts of sexual issues from the inability to achieve orgasm, vaginismus, low desire, erection issues, and can even cause premature ejaculation.
You can overcome a low body image
Poor body image and a low self-esteem are correctable issues. Therapists are widely successful in treating people with those type of concerns. The solution here is simple. We need to stop comparing our bodies to unreasonable ideals and instead, focus on seeing your own beauty.
Body image exercise
Here is an exercise you can do that will enhance your body image. Every time you say something critical about yourself like “wow I am so fat” or “I am so dumb” you must say 5 positive things.
For example: you say to yourself “I am so fat” immediately after say “yes but I have the prettiest eyes, a heart of gold, I work hard, and I make people laugh.” I predict a month of doing this will make you feel better about yourself.
Need help with more ways to overcome your body image and low self-esteem? Contact us today.
